Run #468 Celebrity Boxing; Gypsy Style.
Last
Thursday found the Gypsies wreaking havoc at the wildlife
refuge, how fitting, at Crissy Field. King Rongjon back from
his diplomatic mission to Finland and Russia was on the wagon, never
a pretty sight, and in the mood for someplace new. Exercise never
being his favorite topic unless it involves elbow bending, which he
was studiously avoiding, was of little interest to him so the trail
was short and to the point. Six Of Nine, who changes his hair
color more often than D’anglin Anglin changes his underwear,
brought Two Tickets To Parathighs as meat for the communal
pot. Hard as it is to believe that any woman associating with Six
could be shocked by anything she seemed shocked by the Sacred
Missal. Bigfoot, who couldn’t be shocked by a Taser,
helped jump start the religious observance and once our visiting
priestess got into the swing of things she performed well enough to
have Just Doesn’t Get It and Bella, his pooch, escort
her off to a dark and quiet place after the trail had been done.
Enquiring minds would be interested in whether Just Doesn’t
got it or does Para agree that bestiality is best? Having been
purified in the flames of the Sacred Missal the pack was on-on
into the Presidio. The King had painted a dire picture of the
trail after the second check as one of broken bodies at best and
warned all to beware. Just Charlene blanched at the thought of
being lost and alone in a paradise for serial killers so chose to
walk with the semi*unning Bigfoot as her protector. At the
second check trail did indeed turn steep and dark as pavement was
dispensed with and the trees closed around the pack. Just Pat,
a serious *unner, was so overjoyed by the vicissitudes of the trail
that he couldn’t resist stopping for a euphoric wank. Hairless
Heaver, visiting from Fla., unfortunately stumbled on the act the
sight of which had him living up to his name. Sorry son but you’re
not in Kansas anymore. While all this was going on Whippet In
and Whippet Out were on a serious search for PO as a gift for
Tongueless and Fits In who decided to nip into the bushes and
scratch another itch. How embarrassing for them to have tripped over
Bag Lady and Dr. Kimble. Trails in the Presidio
just seem to bring out the libido even in the likes of Chickless
Boner who was noticed pushing aside leaves and probing the ground
in search of shallow graves and perhaps the woman of his dreams. Is
it any wonder that Chickless gets along so well with all the
Gypsy dogs when they share such joy in rolling around on dead
and rotting things? Trail eventually led back to the cliffs above
Baker Beach and turned toward the bridge. Cruising down Lincoln Blvd.
Tongueless, Fits In, and Drill Me found Scrotum
wandering aimlessly. Having spotted them he dumped his auto and
joined the trail. Sadly Bite Size mistook his enthusiasm at
finding the lost patrol for a threat and before Drill Me could
stop her….well there is some question as to Scrotum keeping
his name. Speaking of names there seems to be some question as to
whether Just Jim was named while he was *unning in Argentina,
while he refuses to say what it might have been it’s likely to have
been something like Obersturmbanfuhrer. As always the trail
eventually ended and the pack regrouped with thoughts of the Sacred
Bucket dancing through their heads. While Sea Breezes moved
from Bucket to gullet those in mortal fear of PO made an
effort to cleanse themselves. Open Wide made quite the
spectacle as she doused herself in Technu and ran naked and screaming
into the bay. Apparently she’d decided that hypothermia was better
than PO or she just could have been looking forward to being rewarmed
by Likes To Lick. The length of the trail and mild evening
combined to encourage the copious flow of alcohol. The thought of so
many DUIs waiting to happen sent Naked Hasher off
faster than a chill in the air. McTaco’s was also an early
departure but at least he had the decency to be carrying enough piss
with him to give the CHP a fighting chance. Boulder Holder
still looking for the voice she lost at Betty Ford was forced to
spend the evening acting like a Marcel Marceau wannabe. Dickless
Namehole was so drunk that he actually dropped a few coins
down her dress, which she kept. The alcohol left Just Bruce
so stiff that a very drunken Rhett Butthole mistook him
for a tree and used him in a doglike fashion. Scarlett O’Hairy’s
valiant efforts to correct Rhett’s mistake only compounded
the problem when Just Bruce mistook her attempts at drying him
for something of a more intimate nature and he lost control of yet
another body function. Blackouts being what they are hopefully none
of the participants will remember the event. At this point the Park
Police decided to arrive. Realizing that the officer in question was
female Tongueless quickly offered her a few untrammeled
minutes in the back of her squad car with Davy Crock O’Shit
who was so far into another universe that he had no idea how much he
contributed to the Gypsies’ evening but being an athlete he
still rose to the occasion. While the crowd was getting drunk or
drunker as the case may be the King abjured doing down-downs
but Bigfoot and Scrotum rolled over him like a Panzer
in heat and emptied half the Bucket into cups. This led to a
contretemps between a sober and surly King and a Bigfoot
feeling her vodka over the need for down-downs and their length. If
only Fox had been there to film it. Bigfoot was certainly
dressed for the part in satin shorts that lacked only the Everlast
logo. At this point Enter The Gerbil who had spent most of the
evening waiting for a bus in Chinatown arrived and separated the
combatants. Phone Sex offering her own inebriated opinion
suggested that down-downs last as long as it would take the average
male Gypsy to cum. Sadly it would hardly be worth the effort
to have a circle lasting a nanosecond. Nutless Sac seemed very
interested in finding out how to make it last that long, not very
good advertising. This set off yet another debate over how long the
average Gypsy male can maintain an erection with LCB
and Shithead representing the long and the short of it. It was
suggested that a returning Jackoff settle things by living up
to his name but he chose discretion over valor. While the screaming
and hair pulling continued the National Guard arrived complete with
Hummer and M-16s. Tongueless was once again dispatched to work
his magic and once again the forces of law and order left with
smiling visages. The forces of anarchy and disorder continued to rule
at the Final Final. Are you ready to rummmble? Cheers.