Run #1351 Let Them Eat Cake!

Last Thursday was Tongueless’ Bday and how better to celebrate being another year older and closer to the Grim Reaper than by having the trail be at Chez T and Fits In so they could avoid the long trek into the city and suck the pack into making the long trek up to Novato. The promise was Fits In’s cooking and baking and they were “FREE” the hasher’s favorite word along with Dr. Kimble’s trail. To refresh the pack and prepare them for the trials and tribulations to cum they were greeted with a keg of Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout and it didn’t take likes of Blow Queen long to pump some of it down his gullet like a knight donning his armor. Speaking of BQ he brought Tears Of Semen and Dick Ass Mother Fucker up in the Tesla. TOS pointed out that Novato was not so far away that BQ needed to beg an extension cord to recharge. It was mind boggling to see the pack actually taking off their shoes particularly since T and FI never bother. The Cunt Next Door thought Qaeda Cunt was so quiet she must be on drugs. No drugs just her home turf and lots of people she likes did the trick. Bitches Bitch spent precious drinking time repeatedly and nervously asking Dr. K if there was any Poison Oak on trail and Dr. K, with a grin plastered on his face, just kept saying it was too dark to tell. At least BB had a sofa to land on when his knees gave out. BB’s knees weren’t the only ones giving out when T took up the Sacred Missal 2.0 and preached a sermon on the love of family. Just Pat had to sit down while Bitch Pimp fanned her brow. Bone Marrow smiled and allowed that the sermon reminded her of how much she missed the Gypsies. Ben Gay listened to her wax eloquent and wondered how much he would have to increase her meds to counter the effects of the sermon. On that note Dr. K presented the pack with a chalktalk and a blessing then sent them into the night. With the pack used to trail in SF there was an almost immediate dancing of headless chickens and Phone Sex wondering aloud if death was immanent. T led the Lost Patrol although the pack was pretty much a lost patrol of its own. 5150, She Came Again, Phone Sex and Just Pat were among the other members of the LP. Trail took the pack back to S. Novato Blvd. and thence behind the place of origin and through the condos and townhouses on the other side of the small creek. Back at the start Fits In swears she could hear the screams of homeowners who were suddenly confronted by the likes of Dick Ass Mother Fucker begging for directions, at least no shots were fired. Trail brought the pack back on to Redwood Blvd. where trail turned uphill and then onto the hillside. T, knowing the area, took the LP over the hill but on the bicycle path so while the pack was wandering in the woods the more sensible were on firmer ground. At Park Crest Ct. trail was found coming off the hillside so the LP moved up and traced trail backwards. The higher they climbed through the brush and weeds the more they thought about food, drink and warmth until having jumped a cement drainage ditch they turned back. T turned back on Redwood and Bitch Pimp rang to say the pack that was being led by TCND had decided that slip sliding away was not what they really wanted to do so that bigger group had descended and she was going to catch up with the LP but it wasn’t long before the rest of the LP had rejoined the pack and all had headed in. Made of sterner and stupider stuff T continued on with Just Pat and BP who did overtake them. Past Scottsdale Pond and around Rowland they trekked. Eventually they were on S. Novato Blvd. and headed in. As they approached the start Fits In rang T to say the pack HUNGRY and HerAssic Park was threatening to punch anyone who cam even close to the Cheetos. When Bitch Pimp heard that she was off like a shot terrified that the orange food would be gone. Just Pat made a pointed reference to mothers being more important than Cheetos but BP was in no mood to dally. Once the DFLers were back the real carousing began, nothing encourages “Saint” Titty Boo Boo like being drunk AND warm. Fits In wisely provided real food in the form of veg and meaty chilies before the down-downs. A Sacred Bucket filled with Dark and Stormys kept the pack in the mood. Once the vultures had been fed T took up the Sword Of Power and convened the Circle out in the yard. Lois Lame suggested that the pack keep the decibels down for the sake of the neighbors and Cockulus Occulus fell over laughing. Speaking of Lois she had a name suggestion for Just Will but that is best left to her to announce. It wasn’t long before the Circle descended into the T’s Bday Ritual of naked pushups. She Came Again may still be suffering from hysterical blindness. HerAssic Park joined in after removing BOTH her bras. All was going well until she lashed out with a food and pushed the ancient one over and the pack realized he hadn’t actually been using his arms at all. Cake was served. Cheers