Run #1373 Reunion, Hell We Could Barely Escape from the Start!

Last week Mr. Bone Jangles commemorated his long ago escape from Reunion Island by once again laying a trail for the Gypsies. What BJ hadn’t counted on was that the upcoming Open Lands Festival, then still 2 weeks away, was going to turn Golden Gate Park into an “escape room” puzzle. The only security that was lacking was a dome over the park to keep hang gliders and parachutist away. Of course all the at security didn’t keep the pack of miscreants from showing up at 25^th Ave and MLK, Jr. drive to stir some shit. It’s a good thing that there were so many dogs there to act as seeing eyes and noses for the trapped troops. Speaking of seeing eye dogs Slap A Bag Of Dicks had Hepatitis Cing Eye Dog there to help me find the keg of Lagunitas Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ at the start. Pencil Dick was depending on Just Arlo to see him through and Just Arlo was fairly champing at the bit to get started and show his mettle. While there were dogs aplenty Pied Piper made sure there was also chocolate aplenty bringing a tear of joy to Tongueless’ tired old eyes. Cums In Boots managed to make it to the start of the trail where he could whine about there not being a Circle last week. Cuming at the start just gave him more drinking and whining time. Happily King Rongjon was there so CIB’s whining was for naught. Backside Banger was clearly in a hurry to get to the keg and while bets were being taken by Twinkle Dick the money that changed hands went to those who bet that he could park his truck without taking half a row of cars out. Closet Twitcher complained bitterly but probably only a 1/8 of a row was damaged. Adopt A Pussy wore a broad grin as he counted his ill-gotten gains. Manhole was there with Mans Best Hole but just long enough to pound some pints. MBH is recovering from surgery so is taking it easy. Manhole is only recovering from the last drinking episode so he had no trouble bending his elbow. CSI was there for a final tuneup before her month of hashing and drinking in Europe and she was training hard. Tongue Depressor, being a degenerate apparently *uns in the family, was looking longingly at Drill Me’s Praetorian Guards Just Koda and Just Zorro a brace of strapping lads with snouts to match. Drill Me kept them aside, saving them for sniffing out trail. Slap A Bag Of Dicks was called forth to preach as punishment for his long absence and because the Male Missal always sounds better when the reader has an accent. This was no exception and One Night Only fairly swooned. On that note BJ sent the pack to follow trail and hope for the best. Trail instantly crossed MLK, Jr. drive and went through the first of many opening in the security fencing that was going up around the pack. Trail took the pack through the woods and around Transverse Dr. At some point the marks began to be not flour but pink chalk with a E next to the arrows. Oops, Cuming Mutha was fisting a quarter inch piece of chalk and laying an Eagle trail. Even the Lost Patrol fell into following the pink! On All 4s had her super duper CM tracking devise on her phone and she was able to keep the mini pack from dissolving in tears and frustration. Trail took the pack across Marx Meadow and JFK Dr. before plunging them back into the woods and around the Polo Field. Qaeda Cunt was thrilled by the odors emanating from the restrooms but Fits In was considerably less thrilled. Apparently somewhere in this vicinity BJ had exited the park and taken to the Avenues to bring the pack to Durty Nelly’s Saloon. Those not carrying wire cutters were still surrounded by fencing and missed his exit. Those who found it were busy pounding pints, um, that they were paying for. Cuming Mutha’s Eagle stayed in the woods and ended up going back around Elk Glen Lake before finding a bit of fencing that was still being connected and were allowed to escape. Dr. Kimble found himself with the LP and oddly enough didn’t seem to mind as he was back at the keg drinking the beer he’s already paid for. Phone Sex arrived late and her screams of torment over the fencing could be heard over the fencing. Lois Lame chose not to mistake, “I’m going to die!” for “On-On”. Udder Moron admitted he was an utter moron for actually following the trail and Hand Pump took pride in having done the whole trail although it’s unclear which “whole trial” he did. Eventually all were together again and the keg tapped while the Sacred Bucket was filled with River Madness; this of course only increased the madness of the pack. Closet Twitcher for example was busily trying to find bits and bobs of wood to start a fire in one of the grates. King Rongjon took up the Sword Of Power and declared the Circle open. RJ lamented how the Circle grows ever wider as he swings the Sword, o yee of little faith. By now our hare had left so he never got his down-down. Cuming Mutha did get a d-d for his Eagle trail. While some were amazed that he’d managed to hang on to that ¼ inch of chalk others allowed that he was used to fisting a ¼ inch. On All 4’s gamely tried to convince the pack that what he was used to fisting actually grew. River Madness and Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ kept the pack from being fooled. Cheers.