Run #1387 5150 and the Return of the Prodigals
Last Thursday was notable for two things 5150 actually set a
trail which meant he was there on time and even better Open Wide
and Likes To Lick were visiting from Austin and brought their
Gymnasts 3, Just Vera Kate, Just Anna Katherine
and Just Lola. 5150 distraught over being anywhere, let
alone, a Gypsies trail on time prevailed on the prodigals to
fill his role and be late, taking pity on 5150 they were. The
rest of the pack was on time, time being a very subjective concept
with the Gypsies, to the start at the Murphy, south, Windmill
and Cottage on MLK, Jr. Dr. in Golden Gate Park. The hare was nowhere
to be seen but he did telephone to say he was still out on trail so
the pack settled in to drink some of the keg of Lagunitas
Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’. For a visual the pack was
treated to seeing Backside Banger leap from a Lyft instead of
his usual playing of bumper cars with his truck. Dr. Kimble
shook his head in dismay and allowed that now there was nothing left
to believe in. The Cunt Next Door and “Saint” Titty Boo
Boo both exercised the privilege of pouring pints while watching
the pack make goo-goo eyes over baby Just Rosie. TCND
didn’t mind those looks but drew the line at Pied Piper
liking his chops! She Came Again had the whole pack licking
their chops with her reading from the Unnamed Missal, which
Adopt A Pussy in his precise lawyerly manner claims is
actually now named “Unnamed Missal”. The hare eventually
made an appearance and declared the trail amazing, this of course set
Bitch Pimp to thanking the Hash Gods that Just Pat wasn’t
there. BP understands 5150’s euphemisms! Our hare
provided a chalktalk that was rife with diagrams and promises of the
sheer joy the pack would experience. On that note the pack was off.
The Lost Patrol consisted of Tongueless and Fits In
along with the chomping at the bit hounds Tongue Depressor and
Qaeda Cunt. The size of the LP grew as OW, LTL
and the Gymnasts leaped from their rental wheels and increased
again as Phone Sex arrived to gush over the prodigals. The
pack found this to be “a wanderlust” trail as the pack wandered
about lusting after marks. It’s important to point out that marks
did in fact exist and they generally led to a false trail mark or to
a backcheck mark. Pencil Dick was pleased he hadn’t brought
Just Arlo or JA would have spent his time chasing his tail the way
the rest of the pack chased theirs. Trail took the pack into the
bowel of the park and then kept excreting them. T took to
blowing through false trails and backchecks and finding the bits and
bobs of true trail that inexorably led him to the next false trail or
backcheck. No marks were needed to follow the plaintive whines of the
Gymnasts 3 who had already been dragged around the city. Even
with her tracking app On All 4s was getting dizzy watching
Cuming Mutha go in circles. Eventually the LP gave up
the ghost and headed back to the start. In dribs and drabs the rest
of the pack appeared from all the directions of the compass rose and
a spot was chosen to set up the table and wash down the Vitamin J
with Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ and Yellow Peril from
the Sacred Bucket. The pack was getting down to some serious
drinking and eating when the lights of the Park Ranger on patrol
picked them out. Tongueless’ Penis tried desperately to turn
himself into just a little dick but failed miserably. T set
off down the road to do his thing while the pack paid no attention. T
was gone so long that FI wondered aloud what was going on but
Blow Queen assured her that T and the officer were
probably just chatting then poured himself another pint. Deadbeat
on the other hand asked if FI had bail money available. As it
turned out BQ was spot on. The officer and T had a very
pleasant chat and by the time the officer left he and T were
on a first name basis. Out came the Sword Of Power and the
Circle was convened. Miscreants were suitably punished with the
majority of down-downs going to the hare. The innocent were also
punished so Manhole came up a fair number of times to drink
his guilt or innocence away. 5150 was put on KP duty and left
looking like Santa with a bag of garbage over his shoulder. Cheers.